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If you knew me, you would be surprised that I haven’t worn any makeup in almost three months. But when your car has no AC and you live in record breaking Phoenix heat, it definitely makes sense.
If you knew me, you would call if you found a mouse, because you would know that I am a better rodent catcher than store-bought traps or exterminators.
If you knew me, you would want to go out for wine every week and share a bottle and an appetizer and watch people walk by on the street.
If you knew me, you’d be in on the secret that I’m not really allergic to seafood and that I just tell people I am so they stop trying to convince me to eat something that completely disgusts me.
If you knew me, you’d keep those damn balloons far away from me, because you’d know how absolutely terrified I am of balloons.
If you knew me, you would know that I am overly sensitive and take too many things personally.
If you knew me, you could tell me who was making your life hell and know that I would do everything in my power to make sure they got a good ass-kicking, because if you were my friend…
You would know I’d do pretty much anything for you.
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