This past weekend has been pretty much awful. One of those nightmare Didn’t-See-That-One-Coming weekends.
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Really, the kind of weekend that makes me want to give up on everything, because seriously, what’s the point? Like all the bad karma I’ve collected lashed out at me all at once.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not writing this as a pity party for myself. I’m not feeling sorry for myself. More like ashamed. Ashamed of all the shit that I’ve done that’s led to this point. Embarrassed, too. Embarrassed at being so fucking stupid so many times. I don’t even want to leave the house anymore, and really, if I did, I couldn’t get very far.
What I want to do, is see past all this. I want to see the good that may come from this horrible mess. I can’t change what has already happened; I need to find a way to move on. So, what I’m asking for, please, is if you guys could maybe send some good vibes my way? I could really use some help trying to find the blessing in all this.